“J-Man… Why do you wear black all the time?”
“Whats with the stupid gloves?”
“Why on earth are you wearing goggles?”
“Are your hands cold or something?”
“Forget to put on a color this morning?”
“Going snowboarding or something?”
“That must be very hot.”
“Um… What is on…. your hands”

I wear all black as a test.  People make so many snap judgements.  About everything.  If the fact that I’m wearing all black makes you not want to talk to me, then I didn’t want to talk to you in the first place.  Thats why I’m wearing all black.  So you won’t talk to me.

I just look good in black.

It amuses me that what I have on can affect the people around me so much.  Look at you, you’re actually bothered by my gloves.  See that girl over there?  She’s paying more attention to me than to her boyfriend.  Which is making her boyfriend pay attention to me.  I don’t actually crave the attention, I am just genuinely amused at how easy it is to get.  Good or bad, I walk into a room and people notice.  When I leave, they’re talking about me.  I love it.

Picture this scene
J-Man enters an 7eleven.  He picks up an Amp and a bottle of Dasani.  He walks to the register.  Behind the counter a fairly cute girl wearing black lipstick pretends to not be intrigued.  Her curiosity will get the best of her…
Goth Chick – Why are you wearing Gloves?
J-Man – So you’d ask me about them
Goth Chick – *giggle*
Do you have any idea how hard it is to make goth chicks giggle?  Its freakin impossible.

With even the littlest bit of wind, black is the coolest color you could wear.  People say it absorbs heat, but thats not true.  Think of white like a shield, and black like… I don’t know, something that allows things to pass through.  Not a shield.  White reflects the heat outside, yes, but it also keeps the heat inside in.  Black breathes, lets the wind blow your heat away.  Why do you think the nomads and crap wear all that black.  Because they’re cold?

Because I’m The J-Man.

Yes when the wind stops blowing I pretty much light on fire.

No my hands are not cold, I wear these for the look.

I’m not going snowboarding, but if I was, I’d be ready.

The whole look is really representative of J-Man as a person.  A 50/50 mix of trying too hard and not caring at all.  It’s the same concept behind the weird confidence I’ve got.  If you can manage to absolutely care about everything, and absolutely not care at the same time, the world becomes a fun place to live.  The “All Black/Fingerless Gloves/Goggles” is the official J-Man uniform now.  Its hecka easy, everything I own matches everything else.  It makes shopping incredibly simple.  Is it black?  Check.  Does it fit?  Check.  Sweet, I’ll take three.  I get up, I throw on whatevers handy, then walk outside and it looks planned.  It IS planned.  And at the same time not.  See what I’m sayin?

Gloves, little dude.

Seriously guys?   I don’t know.  I’m just as confused as you are.  Stop asking me you’re making my head hurt.

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